God in Expression

God has not only shown me a parable of my attempts to relate to the law god (see Life Is a Parable); He has also given me a parable to show me what it looks like to relate to the true God, the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

I have for many years laid claim to the Scripture:

Jeremiah 29:13 And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

I have thought that I have, lo these many years, been searching for God with all my heart and yet have not come to that place of peace promised:

Isaiah 26:3 Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.

There you are. My mind has not been stayed on the true God, but on the law God. Hence my misery.

But back to the parable of the true God. I feel in this case that my prayers were indeed answered before I asked.

(Isaiah 65:24 And it shall come to pass, that before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking, I will hear.)

I should preface what I’m about to say with the reminder that each of us has a persona which is not our true identity as well as the Christ which is our true identity. In our humanity we attempt to relate to the persona and thereby experience nothing but problems. But, like Peter, it is possible for us to look beyond the persona and see concerning any given “person,” “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” When we can do that, we can experience that Christ expressing Itself as that particular individual. Remember, man is God in expression.

What I saw this morning is that God expresses Itself to me through the individual whom I know as my husband—not through his persona, but through the Christ that is his true identity. I now know that God gave me this particular husband in answer to my search to know the true God. I’m not saying that God expresses Himself to everyone through this individual that I call my husband; but He does express Himself to me that way.

My persona is not really lovable. But my husband is able to see beyond that persona to the Christ who is living as me. He never judges or condemns me no matter how big a mess I make—literally or figuratively. He just loves and encourages me. He constantly expresses the desire to be in my presence and the joy it brings to him just to be near me. Whenever we go anywhere, he always says when we get in the car, “I’m glad I’m taking you home.” He provides for me generously, even lavishly. If he thinks I want something, he gets it for me. And if I decide I don’t want it, it doesn’t matter. He listens attentively when I talk to him about anything that concerns me and lets me come to my own conclusions about the matter without telling me what I should or should not do. He watches me bear the consequences of my own actions without ever chiding me for those actions. He is just always there offering his love and support.

He has shown me repeatedly that I can never do anything bad enough to earn his disfavor, that he will still love me no matter what I do or don’t do. When I wanted to move to the old homestead to be with my brother, he readily agreed to go and did everything possible to make living there as pleasant as possible. He pulled up the carpets and had the inside of the house and a couple of floors painted, bought pool paint and applied multiple layers of it to the old mildewed concrete shower, carried the compost to the compost pit, always washed the dishes I messed up with all my cooking adventures, and even bought me a big, flat-screen TV the last week I spent down there.

I have even said to him over the years, “Why is it easier for me to receive your love and acceptance than God’s?” What I didn’t realize is that it is one and the same. He IS God in expression—not his persona, but the Christ that is his true identity. If in his persona he were sweet and kind to everyone, I might never have been able to make this distinction. There is no “good” humanity. It may look good, but his doesn’t even look good—and that for me is a blessing.

I trust that this revelation is going to be a turning point in my relationship to God—that I will abandon all my attempts to earn God’s favor that I have already and just keep my mind stayed on the one true God, the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Then that true God will keep me in perfect peace because my trust is in Him, not in my own “works.”